Chapter 28: Serving Oneself Up for Humiliation

Su Wan’s heart pounded like a drum; she was both expectant and nervous. She took a deep breath, telling herself that this was just a normal part of life for a married couple. Back at her foster parents’ home, she had heard people say that there is no such thing as a barren field, only an exhausted ox. Besides, Qin Yi’s legs were currently without sensation; what if something awkward were to happen?

As Su Wan wrestled with her thoughts, Qin Yi patted her back and gave her earlobe a playful, punitive nip. "Go to sleep."

Su Wan was stunned. She had spent all this time preparing herself mentally, ready to surrender, and he just… did that? That was it? Had she spent all that time preparing for nothing?

Su Wan let out an unhappy huff, acting out in a fit of pique, and turned her back on him, refusing to acknowledge him.

Qin Yi pondered for a few seconds, then let out a soft chuckle. It was his fault for leaving his young wife dissatisfied; they had been married for so long without ever consummating the marriage, and it was entirely on him. In the dim light of the night, Qin Yi’s gaze was profound. He felt a deep sense of regret, his expression softening into something entirely at odds with his usual stoic exterior. He leaned over, pulled her into his arms, and coaxed her gently.

"Wanwan, I want to save this for the day my legs are healed."

Su Wan wasn't truly angry; she just wanted to be coaxed. She gave a small, soft hum in response. Deep down, she felt Qin Yi was right. Even though he was physically capable in "certain" areas, his legs lacked sensation. If something indescribable were to happen midway, it would inevitably affect his performance and hurt his male ego. That would be truly awkward.

"Alright," Su Wan whispered.

Qin Yi lowered his eyes, seeing that the person in his arms had calmed down, and pulled her closer. "Sleep now."

Feeling relaxed, Su Wan realized how exhausted she was. Recovering from an injury takes time, and she clearly hadn't fully healed yet. This was exactly why Qin Yi was worried. He wanted to consummate the marriage, but he cherished his little wife deeply. When she had been abducted, she had suffered immense trauma, both mentally and physically. He held her tight; apart from her soft curves, the rest of her was so thin he felt he might snap her if he used any force. She needed to be well-nourished.

Su Wan’s breathing soon evened out into a sweet slumber. Qin Yi, however, spent the night as if he were being roasted over a fire; the scorching heat within him threatened to consume him. Yet, despite having his wife right there beside him, he couldn't do a thing.

***

Early the next morning, Jiang Boyuan arrived to take Qin Yi for his treatment. Su Wan’s eyes were filled with concern, but Qin Yi gently rubbed her hand to reassure her. "Don't worry, Boyuan is with me. Besides, I’m not a child; I can take care of myself."

A warmth flickered across Qin Yi’s usually cold face. Su Wan’s concern meant she was beginning to hold him in her heart. Although they were still a long way from love, there was hope. It is often said that to win a woman’s heart, if she has not yet known hardship, weave a fairy tale for her; if she has endured great struggle, give her warmth and unconditional love.

Su Wan subconsciously craved warmth, but even when she acted clingy toward Qin Yi, she hadn't truly handed over her heart. Her childhood experiences had instinctually taught her to wrap herself in a protective shell to avoid being hurt. Su Wan tied a scarf around Qin Yi’s neck, her voice warm. "Take care of yourself."

Even after Qin Yi and Jiang Boyuan left, Grandma Qin remained worried. She desperately wanted her grandson’s legs to heal, but she feared the treatment would fail and he would suffer another blow.

"Don't worry, Grandma. This miracle doctor is an expert in difficult and miscellaneous diseases. This time, there will definitely be results." Su Wan managed to soothe her with a few words.

On the other side, Lu Xing watched Qin Yi leave, his eyes drifting involuntarily toward the Qin residence. He was heading to school today and felt agitated. He had seen Su Wan yesterday, but they hadn't said more than a few words. Now, seeing Qin Yi leave, the restlessness in his heart became unbearable; he wanted to see her.

Su Wan stepped out to take out the trash, and Lu Xing’s gaze latched onto her like glue. Without a second thought, he followed her. Lu Xing was usually a steady person, but at that moment, he threw all sense of propriety and shame to the wind.

After dumping the trash, Su Wan turned to find Lu Xing standing right behind her. She frowned in displeasure, gave a curt nod as a greeting, and moved to walk past him. She was Qin Yi’s wife now; regardless of anything else, she had to maintain moral standards, and keeping distance from the opposite sex was the first priority—especially in an era where gossip could crush a person. If people talked, it wouldn't just be her reputation at stake; she would drag Qin Yi’s name through the mud as well.

But Lu Xing didn't see it that way. As Su Wan passed, he grabbed her arm. His expression was wounded; he couldn't believe she wanted to keep such distance from him, especially when she hadn't been like this at school.

"Su Wan."

Su Wan stepped back, maintaining her distance. "What is it?"

Lu Xing, already stung by her coldness, felt a sharp pang at her indifferent tone. "Su Wan, you... is he good to you?"

Su Wan arched an eyebrow, looking at him with a mocking half-smile, and spoke without mercy. "You want to know about our affairs as a married couple?"

After she finished speaking, Lu Xing didn't answer for a long time. He looked as if he were about to shatter. "Su Wan, you know how I feel about you. You... you should be able to feel it. I just wanted to know if you were doing well."

Su Wan looked at him. Once, she had longed for him to take that first step, to silence the rumors and stop her from being bullied. A young girl’s love is subtle yet fervent; she had met him just as her heart was awakening, and he had been as warm as the sun. But reality had stripped the truth bare: Lu Xing did have a crush on her, but only he knew how deep it ran. After all, all the misfortune she suffered at school had been caused by him. He had enjoyed her adoration while keeping her in a state of ambiguity, never willing to take a single step forward. Now that she was married to another, he was here performing a scene of deep, tragic devotion.

She suddenly felt that the person she once loved was nothing special—cowardly and lacking any sense of boundaries. Since he had come to her doorstep, she wouldn't be doing him justice if she didn't scold him for his base behavior.

Su Wan narrowed her eyes and spoke with a cold, insincere smile. "Lu Xing, if you had just been direct about what you wanted to say, I would have respected you as a man. Did you ever?"

"No."

"From start to finish, you’ve been hesitant and vague. I am Qin Yi’s wife now. By pulling and tugging at me like this, have you considered my feelings or my reputation? Have you thought about the kind of scorn I’ll face if others see us?"

Lu Xing’s face turned pale. He opened his mouth to explain, but Su Wan didn't give him the chance, turning up the heat. "You only care about your own pathetic sense of pride. You think that because I once liked you, I should like you forever, and now that you’ve lost that, you’re unwilling to let go. All the bullying I suffered at school was because of you. Xu Ruyin led people to torment me, and even though you saw it, you refused to stand up and say a word of justice."

Lu Xing hurriedly tried to explain, "It’s not like that—"

"You just came here to seek a sense of relevance. Lu Xing, if your house doesn't have a mirror, go find a puddle and look at yourself. See what kind of person you’ve become!"