Chapter 16 Intelligence

Chapter 16: Information

Kiritsugu had died five years ago, yet Illya looked to be around eight years old. This meant Illya must have seen Kiritsugu when she was three. Meanwhile, Lolita’s current appearance had just been adjusted to look around twenty years old, which implied… Did Irisviel give birth to Illya when she was at most twelve or thirteen years old?

What in the world?!

Thus, driven by Rin’s prompting and Fujiko’s deductive reasoning, Uncle Kiritsugu was successfully cast as a shady older man luring foreign little girls with lollipops.

Putting aside the poor, grievance-laden Kiritsugu who had been inexplicably slapped with the label of a Lolicon, Emiya Shirou quietly struck up a conversation with Tohsaka Rin on the other side. "Hey, Tohsaka. Is Archer really..."

Shirou trailed off, unable to finish his sentence, and his suspicion was hardly unjustified. Heroic Spirits transcended timelines, making it entirely possible for past or future Heroic Spirits to manifest. It wasn't out of the question that Illya's mother, Irisviel, had been summoned. Furthermore, apart from her age, Archer looked almost identical to Illya—she was practically an adult version of her.

"Of course not. Archer’s True Name is Redona Lolita, not some Einzbern named Irisviel," Rin whispered in denial.

As for Lolita, the protagonist of this volume, she had just finished chasing down the coffee table at the end of the previous chapter and had only now returned to the scene to get back into character...

Fujiko watched as Lolita lowered her head, gently wiping away a stray smudge of grease from the corner of Illya's mouth. Instead of maintaining the refined elegance of a young aristocratic lady as she had moments before, Illya puffed out her cheeks and buried her face directly into Lolita's chest, rubbing against it indiscriminately. Lolita patted Illya's small head with a look that was equal parts affectionate and helpless, smiling wryly and shaking her head as she let the girl make a total mess of her newly changed clothes.

Although this completely shattered the refined young lady aura Illya had just established, Fujiko didn't find it annoying at all. On the contrary, the scene gave her a deeply warm and blissful feeling. It made her hesitate, wondering whether she should tell them the news of Kiritsugu's death... Though they would find out sooner or later, telling them now felt far too cruel...

"?" Fujiko noticed Lolita looking up at her and assumed "Madam Irisviel" had sensed something. She quickly flustered and stammered in concealment, "Ah, haha, well... Kir-Kiritsugu... he's just gone away on a trip! You know how it is, Kiritsugu has a habit of traveling frequently! This time he just suddenly went abroad... Oh right, you haven't introduced this blonde lady next to you yet. Is she a relative?"

"Such a flustered tone, as if she's trying to change the subject. But really, just because our gazes met for a second, does she have to make such a big deal out of it?... Wait, the memory control acquired through our eye contact—it's not just for people who have lost consciousness; locking gazes can play a minor role too. Emiya Kiritsugu died long ago? Eh? What's this about? She doesn't actually think I'm Irisviel, does she?" Lolita thought with a strange expression, while her body continued to perform a mother's duties.

"Yes, I am a distant cousin of Madam Irisviel, Saber. I just happened to tag along for the trip," Saber said upon hearing herself being mentioned. She put down her bowl, went along with Fujiko's narrative, and answered as smoothly as silk. Her face didn't flush and her heart didn't skip a beat—her acting skills easily reached EX rank.

"Ah, is that so? Then Saber-chan must have a wonderful time playing here. The people around here are very enthusiastic, you know. When I have time, I'll take you sightseeing around Shinto too," Fujiko said with a dry laugh.

"Yes, I have already fully experienced the enthusiasm here. If you don't mind, I would like another bowl," Saber said, handing her empty rice bowl to Emiya Shirou.

Emiya Shirou, standing nearby, glanced at the two empty rice cookers and rolled his eyes. Because there were more people eating this time, he had gone out of his way to set up two extra rice cookers. As a result, they had barely started eating when Fuji-nee suddenly barged in aggressively, causing everyone else to miss out on their meal. Yet, in just this short span of time, the rice from both cookers had completely vanished into Saber's stomach, and judging by her look, she still wasn't full...

***

Let's hurry up and move the plot along, or the readers are going to go crazy.

"Rin! I need an explanation! I'm losing my mind!" Lolita soothed Illya before heading over to Tohsaka Rin's room.

"Oh? You're here. Well, it's no big deal, right?" Rin said nonchalantly.

"Easy for you to say since it's not you! This young lady has experienced way too much today! Do you have any idea what my mood is right now? My current feelings simply cannot be expressed in words! Try to put yourself in our shoes—how would you feel if someone who has never been in a relationship suddenly became a wife? And a mother! How many steps did that skip?! Do you seriously think Heroic Spirits can just be treated like this? Tell me, when the Holy Grail War ends and I leave this place, what is going to happen to Illya?!" Lolita roared.

"It seems you still care a lot about that little loli!" Rin laughed.

"You bastard! Isn't this all because of your damned Command Spells?! You've already wasted two of them! If we run into danger again and you use your last Command Spell to summon me, I'll become an independent Heroic Spirit without a master. What are you planning to do then? And wasting precious Command Spells on such boring nonsense—are you trying to get yourself killed? If you want to die that badly, you won't even need another Master to step in; I'll grant you release myself!" Lolita delivered a remark loaded with double meaning.

"This..." The barrage of aggressive accusations left Rin momentarily at a loss for words. She had originally assumed Archer was angry simply because she had been thrust into the role of a mother out of nowhere, but the reality was the exact opposite. What Archer truly cared about was Rin's own safety.

"Of course, if I do become a masterless Heroic Spirit, have you figured out how I'll retaliate against you by then?" Lolita suddenly said with a wicked smile.

It was true that she had been reckless this time. Although she had secured the help of a Berserker, she was now left with only a single Command Spell, and she had somehow managed to alienate Archer. Who knew if using the final Command Spell would result in her being eliminated by her own Servant?

"Let me tell you one more thing." Lolita stood up, turned around at the doorway, and added, "Command Spells can force a Servant to undergo spatial teleportation. So, imagine if you were facing an enemy magus and suddenly used a Command Spell to teleport their Servant right next to you."

"!" Rin's expression shifted drastically! If such a thing were to happen, the opposing Master would undoubtedly die instantly.

"Exactly! Three Command Spells, three Masters—that is the true Holy Grail War; everything before this was just child's play." Lolita smiled faintly and continued, "Command Spells actually have very little effect when used for vague or long-term commands. For instance, an order like 'Obey me forever'—the effect produced by a Command Spell for such long-term directives is pitifully small. However, you are special, Rin. The Command Spells you use can produce effects far stronger than those of ordinary magi. You could even say your Command Spells have the power to make a Heroic Spirit's specific skill even stronger... or even weaker. The absolute effects a Command Spell can achieve are singular commands like 'Catch that plate,' 'Retreat,' 'Attack him,' or 'Recover.'... Anyway, that's all I have to say. Stop messing around, Rin!" With those words, Lolita opened the door and left, though she glanced toward the corner of the hallway as she stepped out.

"..." Rin sat kneeling on the cushion, biting her lip in deep thought, before suddenly lifting her head. "Come out, Emiya-kun! You heard everything Archer just said, didn't you?"

"Yeah," Emiya Shirou stepped into the room. "Tohsaka, stop messing around. Archer is right; you shouldn't waste your Command Spells like that. Is Archer's combat capability really inferior to that Berserker? Besides, that Berserker probably only has one life left by now, right?!"

"Yeah, you're right. I really do need to reflect on myself." Watching Shirou as he turned around and walked out after speaking, Tohsaka Rin muttered to herself.

***

Yesterday's events quickly faded into the past, yet Emiya Shirou brought back another piece of news the next day.

"Laughing Shrine? Is that a pun?" Illya asked, sitting comfortably in Lolita's lap.

"No way, it's not the Laughing Shrine, it's Emiya, Emiya Shirou!" Ever since Illya moved in, though Fujiko still called Emiya Shirou "big brother," Shirou had insisted that the girl call him by his first name instead, so he kept correcting her. He had already corrected her several times, but each time Illya's pronunciation became stranger than the last. Was she really doing it on purpose?

"Shirou... Shirou! Mm, this name is quite simple, but it sounds very crisp and clear. I like it a lot, Shirou!" Abandoning the difficult surname, the young girl arbitrarily discarded the family name and nodded with a happy expression.

"Emiya, wasn't there something much more important than this before?" Rin said with a hint of dissatisfaction as she watched the two interacting in the living room, alongside Lolita who was smiling happily nearby.

"Just now, when I was leaving school, I ran into Rider..." Shirou's single sentence instantly froze the previously harmonious atmosphere.

"You ran into Rider?! Weren't you hurt, Shirou?" Before Shirou's words had even fully settled, Saber cast aside all else and rushed forward anxiously to inspect her Master from head to toe.

"No, I'm fine." Shirou awkwardly stopped his Servant's actions. "Rider didn't attack me; I simply had a brief conversation with Rider's Master."

"Wai—wait a minute, Emiya, did you just say you met Rider's Master?" Rin asked in astonishment.

"Yeah, Rider's Master is Shinji," Shirou stated, naming the person whom Lolita had already placed at the very top of her execution list.

"Matou Shinji? That seaweed-head?" Rin furrowed her brow, clearly holding a very poor impression of Matou Shinji. However, her expression was laced with deeper suspicion. "Even though the Matou family is indeed a lineage of magecraft, the bloodline of magi among them should have been severed long ago. Besides, I can't feel a shred of magical energy coming off that seaweed-head. A guy like that could be a Master?"

"Indeed, Shinji told me just now that he isn't a true magus either, and merely possesses the 'knowledge' of magecraft he once studied. He was simply chosen by the Holy Grail and forced into this Holy Grail War," Shirou confirmed, validating Rin's judgment. "Moreover, I saw that Rider obeys Shinji completely, so there's no doubt he is a Master."

'Matou Zouken? That disgusting old geezer, his dark magic is decent enough, but... you're dead!' Lolita resolved inwardly.

PS: Some people have asked me to just bring Matou Sakura back? Do you guys think a Netorare scenario is okay? Are you kidding me?! This isn't a harem story! Having four of them already feels like too many.