Volume One, Chapter Forty-Four: Exchanging the King of Divine Artifacts for the Three Great Witches?

Chapter Forty-Four: Trading the King of Divine Crystals for the Three Great Demonesses?

Under the influence of Tuzhe and Doggie, the cunning old Mara soon picked up quite a few of the latest slang and internet lingo from Jambudvīpa.

Tuzhe, still somewhat confused, asked, “So, you mean even Indra doesn’t have one of these?”

Mara bellowed, “I’ve only ever heard of it! How could he possibly be more capable than me?”

Doggie egged him on from the side, “Hey, Scoundrel Bro, why not just give one to Indra and exchange it for your ladies, then you can go back to wooing them, yeah?”

Tuzhe ignored Doggie and turned to Mara, “Master, please go on.”

Mara continued, “Below Supreme Grade, including Supreme Grade itself, the crystals are all single-colored. Once you reach the Sacred Grade, even the lowest is dual-colored.

“Two-colored ones are Lower Sacred-Grade Brahma Crystals, holding as much energy as the entire Brahma essence of a minor celestial realm.

“Three-colored ones are Middle Sacred-Grade, with the energy of three minor celestial realms.

“Four-colored ones are Upper Sacred-Grade, equivalent to six minor celestial realms.

“Five-colored ones are Lower Imperial-Grade, matching ten minor celestial realms.

“Six-colored are Middle Imperial-Grade, equal to twenty.

“Seven-colored are Upper Imperial-Grade, worth thirty.

“Eight-colored—that’s a Divine-Grade Brahma Crystal, containing the sum of sixty minor celestial realms.

“And nine-colored, that’s the King of Divine Crystals! Damn it, that’s as much as a hundred and twenty minor celestial realms! Heaven, earth, gods, buddhas—just let me die now, waaaah—”

Tuzhe was already numb with shock.

One King of Divine Crystals equaled the combined Brahma essence of a hundred and twenty minor celestial realms. The entire Three Realms only had thirty such realms!

Eyes brimming with tears, Mara counted on his fingers and muttered as if possessed, “Just one… One would be enough for my cultivation for millions of years. Just one, that’s all I need… waaaah…”

Tuzhe felt a pang of pity at the old man’s utter disregard for dignity and said,

“Um, Master… I think I might have more than one King of Divine Crystals?”

Mara wiped his eyes and roared, frightening as a demon, “No! There’s only one Brahma Egg, I’m not fighting you for it. But this time, if you give me a King of Divine Crystals, I’ll trade you my three greatest demonesses right now, no matter what! Whether you like it or not, this has to happen. I’ll be unreasonable for once! What do you say, boy?”

Doggie immediately kicked Mara aside, put paws on hips, and yelled furiously, “You old pervert! Are your three demonesses so valuable? Want to tempt my Scoundrel Bro? Forget it—don’t even think about it!”

Mara was stunned for a moment, then asked uncertainly, “You really don’t know how beautiful my closest three demonesses are? They may not surpass Yueyi, the most beautiful woman in all Three Realms, but they’re not far behind, are they?

“And besides, does Yueyi have their allure?

“Does she have their sensual charm?

“Ask any of the great powers in the Three Realms—how many of them don’t drool over my three demonesses?

“Er, well, Celestials don’t actually drool, but you get my meaning, right?”

Doggie shrieked, “What do you know! There you go showing your true colors! You act all noble, calling yourself the real Little Silver, but you’re no better than Indra, you’re just as bad, grrr, you’re driving me mad—”

Mouxiuloutuo interjected, “Doggie, that’s your elder, can you…”

Doggie protested, “What elder? Who has elders like that? If you want something from Scoundrel Bro, just say it, why all the fake trading and bargaining? Hypocrite, degenerate, shameless—no one can beat you, hmph!”

Mara looked pitifully at Doggie, then at Tuzhe, “Disciple, am I really that shameless?”

Tuzhe chuckled, “Master, if you want some, just tell me how many you think is fair, and we’ll see how to divide them…”

Mara’s Adam’s apple bobbed up and down for a long while before he finally managed to stammer out a number:

“There are… thirty-six in total…”

Tuzhe, having calmed down, said coolly, “That many? Then how many do you want, Master?”

Mara’s jaw dropped, “How many? One… maybe… two? Er… three, four, five, six?”

Mouxiuloutuo groaned—never had he seen a greedier demon. Did Mara even realize what he looked like right now? No? Then just go die!

Doggie put paws on hips and yelled, “What, what, what! Why don’t you just rob him? Why don’t you just drop dead?”

Finally regaining his composure, Mara gave a bitter laugh and said, “One. Even for just one, I’d give you all three demonesses. Otherwise, what kind of master would I be, getting things from my disciple for nothing?”

Tuzhe said, “Master, just hand over ten for me to use first.”

Mara immediately sent his consciousness into the third level of the Pagoda and brought out ten Kings of Divine Crystals. As the nine-colored radiance flared, everyone’s pores opened, the light flooding into their bodies until they all wanted to cry out in bliss.

Tuzhe picked up three crystals and said, “These are for you, Master.”

Mara stared in bewilderment for a long time. “These… are for me?”

Doggie yanked Tuzhe’s hair in a fit, “Why, why, why—”

Tuzhe smiled and nodded. “Master, if not for you, I might not have made it out of Mount Sumeru alive. This is my respect and gratitude as your disciple. You deserve it.” As he spoke, he placed the King of Divine Crystals in Mara’s hands.

Mara shook his head in heartfelt emotion, “I won’t pretend anymore. But those three demonesses are still yours.”

Doggie shouted, “No! Why—”

Tuzhe rubbed his nose and said, “Master, about those demonesses… let’s just leave it for now, okay? I’m still, um, original, you know? Let’s talk about it later, all right?”

Mara replied, “What are you thinking? I meant to have them serve as your bodyguards. Each of them has reached the realm of Divine King—though not quite at their peak yet, but with their secret techniques, they’ll have no trouble holding off Indra, right?”

Doggie’s eyes spun. “Oh, so they’re just bodyguards? That’s fine, but they’re not allowed to seduce Scoundrel Bro, or I’ll skin them alive, gouge their eyes, cut their noses and ears…”

Doggie, could you be any more brutal?

Tuzhe thought it over. He was about to seek the materials to cultivate the Immortal Demon Body, and who knew what dangers he might face? With these three demonesses, at least he’d have some solid protection.

So Tuzhe bowed to Mara, “Thank you for your generosity, Master!”

Then Tuzhe took out three more Kings of Divine Crystals, and said to Mouxiuloutuo, “Master Mou, Doggie is my sister. I can see how deep and sincere your feelings are for her. Please accept these three crystals.”

Mouxiuloutuo was stunned.

Wait, I get some too? And three, at that?

Kings of Divine Crystals are rare, even if Tuzhe has thirty-six of them. He’d given three to Mara, and now was offering three to Mouxiuloutuo as well.

Wasn’t this a bit excessive?

Mara and Mouxiuloutuo exchanged glances, and even their ancient, seldom-ruffled hearts were stirred.

This boy… he’s truly loyal and righteous. But that’s six gone already—if he keeps being so generous, will his promises mean anything in the future?